Your 100%* reliable guide to the future of crypto in 2023! – Attack of the 50 Foot Blockchain

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For amy beaver Y david gerardo

With all these cryptocurrency buyers gutted, there are plenty of convenient fortune-telling innards out there. So it’s time to channel our inner maren altman and see what the blockchain tells us will happen in 2023!

Our predictions for 2022 were correct on almost everything, except where we underestimated the power of human stupidity.

*within acceptable margins of error

mystic meg

How we did it for 2022

These were David’s predictionsalthough he did not stick his neck out much:

  • Bitcoin: “Think of the dumbest thing they could do. No, dumber than that. We point to the entirety of cryptocurrencies since May 2022 to show how correct this one was.
  • Real dollars in the crypto system were already running out by the end of 2021. The bubble burst in May and retail went home.
  • Miners were already getting stuck with unsalable bitcoins. Our Article from August describing the collapse of US bitcoin mining. continues to develop as we described.
  • The cryptocurrency is still made of ass to really wear, but that was never going to change.
  • Nobody managed to invent a new magic bean even dumber than NFTs. Human stupidity, you failed us!

These were Amy’s predictions:

  • “Bitcoin hasn’t suffered a tremendous crash yet, but the conditions are ripe for a crash: lax regulatory oversight and a lack of real dollars in the system.” The great crash, when it finally came, unfolded in even more spectacular ways than any of us could imagine.
  • After growing 388% in 2021, stablecoin companies would feel the heat from regulators. TerraUSD imploded in May, and US Treasury Secretary Janet Yellen had to explain Terra-Luna to Congress the day after it collapsed – and promised more regulation right there. The October Financial Stability Oversight Council (FSOC) report he is intransigent.
  • NFTs were the brightest new crypto scam in 2021, but all crypto scams have a limited lifespan. Crypto bros would need to find a new way to attract dumb money. But they couldn’t do it in 2022. They lured some with mining, but that was the last fool money.
  • Regulators would tighten the noose on the NFT market. In May, the SEC announced that it would double the size of its crypto and cyber assets unit to focus on NFTs, as well as DeFi, stablecoins, and exchanges. [SEC; Bloomberg] In June, the Department of Justice indicted Nate Chastain, a former OpenSea executive, in what was the first NFT insider trading case. In October we found out that the SEC is investigating Yuga Labs to see if Bored Ape Yacht Club NFTs, as well as ApeCoin, are unregistered security offerings.

What’s next: our predictions for 2023!

Everything that started to happen in May 2022, when Terra-Luna exploded, has not finished unfolding yet. None of this is over yet, not at all. Crypto companies don’t have real money, and they all know it: everyone is already completely screwed. In 2023, we will continue to see them all go bankrupt one by one. The fall of FTX will continue to ruin everyone who was considered still solvent.

The cryptocurrency industry is a bunch of drunks supporting each other, postponing total collapse for as long as they can in the hope that some miracle will save them. Crypto companies will keep buying smaller companies to cover the holes in their accounts – bigger and bigger shells to hide the word pea.

Investigations into FTX and the Celsius Network will continue to reveal shocking discoveries, of the kind that followed the QuadrigaCX collapse. even worse than we have viewed so far.

Binance or Tether are likely to drop in 2023. Binance is more likely. (But then, we thought that Tether would definitely stop working in December 2017.)

The same guys that created FTX ex nihilo will try to create another crypto futures exchange out of thin air to replace FTX. Laundromats have to wash. Wintermute was tipped for the job, but they may be even dumber than the FTX team.

The bitcoin price is falling further. We don’t see any potential new buyers putting real dollars into the system any time soon.

The Pax dollar (including USD Binance) and USDC stablecoins, backed by the only real dollars in the crypto system, will likely be substantially depleted by 2023. This may or may not be done in an orderly fashion.

US banks that saw a big opportunity in the slightly gray cash market will be closely scrutinized by regulators and are likely to see extreme restrictions or even shut down.

The remaining positive public perception of the cryptocurrency has been completely destroyed, and will continue to be so. “The future of finance” will become increasingly associated with frauds, scams, and hobbyist hustlers like Sam Bankman-Fried.

the public is Annoying and the legislators are Annoying. Regulators are seizing their opportunity to act while they can. The SEC will be more aggressive in its enforcement actions, sort of everyone token in DeFi is an unregistered penny stock under US rules, and always was. The CFTC and the Department of Justice have already started making arrests for mischief in the DeFi market, such as the Avi Eisenberg bust just after Christmas. Market manipulations have always been illegal, but the laws are finally being enforced.

Crypto has yet to come up with anything stupider than NFTs. But you know they will keep trying.


Image: British newspaper astrologer meg mystic Never has as far as we can find he made predictions about something as silly as cryptocurrency.

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